Assessment

from the forest

to the cat, green hat—

things we wanted

like beetles in a jar

(non-preserved)

distant god-watching

ultimately unfruitful

 

suitable it seemed

to stroll wine-sparkled

and violin at the sky

with cello’d flute—

there was a chill in it

green and gold lights

chained trees in stone

(and we thought

this was

living)

 

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Assessment

  1. …so interesting for a non-native speaker like me…
    “distant god-watching”, “to stroll wine-sparkled / and violin at the sky…” structures that would need, at least, twice more words in French… and I especially like the three last lines in bracket. Beautiful, as always! 🙂

    Like

    1. Thanks–it was a magical place/evening that I was remembering. Don’t know why I couldn’t put it in a more chipper poem. Maybe I will, eventually.

      Like

      1. Magic always happens in a real life, which typically is not so magical …. I like how this works. The tension brings out the substance of both. Not that I want you to have any unchipperness. Nice job!

        Like

I'd be so happy to hear from you.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s